Friends

I seem to be losing friends these days rather than making them.

The latest is my flatmate. I've blogged a bit about her loser boyfriend: in a nutshell: he had an affair with her years ago while still married - am disgusted at her with that as she knew about his wife - they split up, she met someone else, split up with the new bloke and got back together with this guy three years ago or more now. The marriage was allegedly over when they first went out and he was sleeping on the sofa, yeah right. He's been getting divorced ever since they got back together but it's still not through. Over a year into the relationship he told her that not only did he have a daughter with his wife, who my friend knew about, he also had another 16 year old daughter with another woman he was once engaged to. Her family is disgusted at it, she has totally lost contact with most of her friends, I have lived with her for nearly a year now and have known her well for 10 years and yet I can count on one hand the number of times I have met him. She has embraced his family as her own, he has alienated her from her family and friends and she does all the running in the relationship. He clicks his fingers and she drives half an hour to his place, at all hours, including 1.30am. If they have a row, he kicks her out of his place and she drives home. She told me last week, by email that she was moving in with him. I was furious that she told me by email and I replied, by email, telling her that I didn't know her any more and she didn't know me and I wasn't remotely surprised and that I never saw her any more. She replied saying she found it difficult to talk to me as I was so negative about boyf and various other things and I told her that she was making a commitment in moving in with him but that he wasn't as he's already been married and had children and been engaged etc all before. She was meant to be back last Thursday but she's arrived only tonight and is off on holiday with boyf and his SISTER(!) on Friday and won't be sleeping here again. We're apparently talking on Wednesday evening but I'm not hopeful. I'm not even sure what she wants me to say or what she wants to talk about. It feel as if she wants me to tell her it's wonderful and to go on ahead but I'm not doing that because it's the worst move of her life and I'll be the mug picking up the pieces in the future when he dumps her. I'm tired of doing that when no one is around to pick up the pieces of me when my life goes pear-shaped. She doesn't even know how bad my joints have been nor the fact that I'm looking at going on the methotrextate and the implications of all of that. I know that I'm the one responsible for my body and what I decide to do but sometimes it would be nice to talk to someone else about it and the pros and cons.